The Starting Point of Personal Growth: Self-Love

“Love is the flowing, the outpouring, the rendering from the heart and soul of emotional goodness to yourself first- and then to others in your life”

To start anywhere on this discussion of love and self-appreciation, we must first try to accurately define love itself. My favorite definition comes from Bob Hoffman which I’ve included above.

Wait a second.. is Hoffman suggesting here that we love ourselves first before loving others?

This is exactly what he’s saying, and I’ve come to believe this is the best route to living a happy and fulfilling life.

It seems like self-love, nowadays, is completely overlooked as a necessity for a healthy psychology.

If we spend our entire day neglecting the better aspects of ourselves, we’re committing a monumental disservice to our life and our futures.

Ask yourself this: If you don’t love yourself, why should anyone else love you?

While we’re off spending our day at work, focusing on other peoples’ tasks and living in the hustle and bustle, it seems like there is almost no time to give ourselves what we truly need.

I believe that Self-love, especially through the appreciation of different aspects of yourself, is the missing ingredient in today’s work-life balance.

How To Practice Self-Love

  • Spend 5 minutes in the morning writing down a few things you appreciate about yourself. (When was the last time you got appreciation from YOURSELF?)
  • Look in the mirror, in silence, and appreciate several different aspects of yourself. These don’t all have to be physical, you could appreciate your kindness towards others or your ability to solve problems well. I find it just enhances the feeling of self-love when you do this in a mirror.
  • Throughout the day, make it a habit to take the time to say “I love myself”. This could be said in your mind, or even under your breath (haha, I don’t care- do it!). Make this habitual though, almost like an instinct.It works great if you cue it to something.
  • Example: When you’re being hard on yourself about a project, or for your grades in school, use this as a cue to step out of the situation and say “Even though this happened, I Love Myself.”
  • When you’re considering how unhappy you are with parts of your body, stop yourself- and replace those thoughts with things you do appreciate.
  • A journaling practice really helps with self love. I love checking in with each aspect of myself (Intellectual, Emotional, Spiritual, and Physical Body) while I journal, allowing them each a separate voice to write whatever they feel on the pages.

When you start loving yourself, you become your own best ally. You won’t need to get attention from the people around you, and you’ll start living the life that you really want to live.

The opinions of others, while they are still certainly useful at times, won’t stop you from doing what you know is right.

This website is about living the most authentic life possible, and in order to do that you have to be able to stay true to your self.

Self-love is a key to unlocking your freedom of expression. It comes when you’re no longer bothered by other people’s opinions.

Give yourself a gift today, and start some sort of practice of self love. The best practice is one that you can stick to consistently, even if its only a minute a day.

Build up gradually from whatever practice you start, so that each day you begin loving yourself more than the day before.

One you realize how powerful you are when you’re on your own team, then you will be ready to share that love with others.

The gift of love can only be shared if you love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, then no one is more deserving of your attention than YOU.

Books that teach the practice of Self-Love:

You Can Heal Your Life
You Can Heal Your Life
Journey Into Love
Journey Into Love
Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It
Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It

-Anthony from

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